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For those of you who are A-Types and therefore have
no time to spare, for those of you who are Gen-Slackers and therefore have no patience to spare, for those of you
who are on the Silicon Valley 60 Hour Work Week Road To An Early Grave program and therefore have to watch your remaining
hours closely, we here at BJE present an astrological forecast to suit your needs. Behold the Internet's one and
only...
Microwave Horoscope
aka Thirty Seconds To Enlightenment
For Sunday, June 29, 2008 and the foreseeable future
Zodiac (Jan 1-Dec 31):Use your heart rather than your head this week. Take
a moment to relish all you have. The truth shall set you free. Review aspects of your life related to health and you may
find it is time to begin a new diet or exercise regimen. Put your goals in the cross hairs and move toward them. You can’t
judge a book by its cover. Today it seems as if you are the sun and the planets revolve around you. Let it slide. Don’t
be shy about granting favors for friends or partners and you will find the deed reciprocated in kind. A penny saved is a
penny earned. You deserve a break today. One can get further with sugar than salt.
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In our ongoing commitment to bring you the best in content, we here at BJE Enterprises proudly present:
MY PET PEEVE OF THE MOMENT
So as you will read below, Friday was a heck of a day at work. We had customer appreciation day. Food, a
DJ, giveaways, etc. And there's this customer...we all know her. She walks in and you KNOW it's not gonna be good.
You KNOW why her husband divorced her. You KNOW that if he hadn't, one of em woulda been dead by now. She's the
type that just HAS to find the down side to everything. I really wish I could get into the details of the reason for
her coming in but I can't. Suffice it to say that she's so negative that water is thicker than blood. Anyway,
she comes in and, as we're dressed according to the theme of the day, she sits down and sneers at the DJ. Now the music
was NOT that loud. Everyone else was going about their business just fine. So she says, "Oh, I guess you're not
handling business today. Doesn't look very professional in here." How many businesses do YOU know that have a
customer appreciation day where they give away a car?!? She asks if there will be a time later today when there won't
be any music. So I finish up her business ASAP (Bitch). Then, before she leaves, I try ONE more time. I
ask if she wants, she could take some food with her. Her responses were, "Cholesterol" "Fat" "Unhealthy"
She ended up leaving with a bottled water. Gosh I wish I could've added some urine to that bottle before she left.
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We here at BJE are proud to present the latest and greatest addition to this site. Here you will find
the best of the best in media entertainment, be it music, movies, video games. Keep your finger (not that one, stop
that!) on the pulse of the entertainment industry. We call it:
DUDE, YOU GOTTA CHECK THIS OUT!!
SOUND THE TRUMPETS!! LET LOOSE THE PIGEONS!! It has almost arrived!! Chris de Burgh's long awaited
new studio album, "The Storyman" will be released on October 6th. The first single,One World,
will be released on September 22nd. A word of warning. Bhagwan Joe's good friend, LuauPig is marking his calendar. I hope
he leaves enough for the rest of us. A U.S. tour is doubtful but...hope springs eternal. C'mon Chris, get over
here!! Enough with Eastern Canada.
I
was hoping to put a daily or weekly fortune cookie for you all. You know, wisdom in a folded almond cookie. But
instead I found a site that already has one set up. You can add the "...in bed" part on your own. Enjoy
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